Month: March 2022

Of all the gifts a parent can give a child, the gift of wings is probably the most difficult. Most parents are nurturers, and they will do anything possible to protect their children. Giving children wings means allowing them to make decisions, which is a test of all the parents have taught along the way.

Wings begin the first day a parent allows the child to play outside alone, the first day the child walks into school alone, and the first overnight visit with someone besides family. Dating and driving a car alone come shortly after. After years of being “in charge,” the parent must trust that his son or daughter will make wise choices, as will the others he or she is with.

Our church had a bus wreck on the way to a retreat when our daughter was a baby, and nineteen young people died. The first time I put my two older children on a bus to a church retreat, I was a basket case. I cried for three hours after they left. I let fear consume me.

While they were gone, I realized that God loved them even more than I did, and I had to trust their safety to Him. It was a life-changing event.

No one can assure the safety of our children. We live in a world where bad things happen. I learned I had to rely on God to care for them, and the training my husband and I gave them would allow them to make wise decisions. It is not an easy thing.

Cell phones and apps did not exist when our children were growing up, and we did not know where they were every moment, but I think that may have been a blessing. Today, parents can trace their children’s every move, and I believe that makes it even harder to let go when the time comes. Be wise in reducing your watch care.

When my youngest son was in high school, he asked why he had to be in at a specific time. “Don’t you trust me?” I assured him that I trusted him, but I did not everyone else who would be out later than his curfew.

For years, a plaque hung in our home that read, “The most important gifts we give our children are roots and wings.”

I felt my children were a gift given to me by God to love and protect. So how do I give them wings and keep them safe? These are some of the ways I found:

• Invest in their lives by teaching them the dangers to watch for. This generation faces challenges we did not even imagine. Don’t hide your head in the sand about what those are. Educate them about drugs, alcohol, and stranger danger.
• Trust them in small things and move to the more significant issues as they mature. Prom night does not fall under the same rules as dinner and a movie. Set reasonable curfews, and then change your expectations as they prove they are trustworthy. A family I know of set three alarm clocks and expected each child to turn off the alarm when they came in. I am not sure the parents ever went to sleep, but it gave the children a sense of responsibility for being in on time.
• Encourage them to check in with you if they are late. Things happen, but it should never become a habit to be late.
• Pray for guidance in the freedoms you allow and bathe them in prayer, even when they are no longer in your home.
• Don’t make trust a one-way street. Help your children know that they can trust you to keep your word by not checking on their every move.
• Return the courtesy by checking in when you will be late.
• Most importantly, tend the roots you have established as they were growing up.

Your children will probably make mistakes, but that can happen even if you are at their sides every moment. If possible, guide them to rectify the errors, but don’t lay a guilt trip on them. Again, each day is the first day of the rest of their lives. If you walk them through mistakes with love, you will not suffer the loss of a broken relationship. A child needs to know that his parents will be in his corner even when the world goes awry.

I am not attempting to make this sound easy, and it definitely isn’t! Letting go is one of the most difficult challenges we face as parents. However, if you have planted roots in their lives, you will find that the wings will be far more manageable. Be sure that both you and your children are rooted in scripture and the love of God. He will walk you through the challenges because His love never fails.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua1:9

• 



Ultimate Social Media – Define which pictures & texts will get shared

Toggle panel: Ultimate Social Media – Define which pictures & texts will get sharedPicture (For social media sharing)

Title (leave blank to use the post title)This title will be used when shared on Facebook, Linkedin and WhatsApp. Leave it blank to use the post title. [Developers: this is used by the open graph meta tag «og:title»]95 Characters RemainingDescription (leave blank to use the post exerpt)This description will be used when shared on Facebook, Linkedin, Twitter and WhatsApp (if you use ‘Twitter cards’). Leave it blank to use the post excerpt. [Developers: this is used by the open graph meta tag «og:description»]297 Characters RemainingPicture (For social media sharing)

Pinterest description (leave blank to use the post title)This description will be used when this post is shared on Pinterest. Leave it blank to use the post title.TweetThis will be used as tweet-text (the link which get shared will be automatically the added at the end). If you don’t enter anything here the tweet text will be used which you defined globally under question 6 on the plugin’s settings page.106 Characters Remaining

AIOSEO Settings

Toggle panel: AIOSEO SettingsGeneralSocialSchemaLink AssistantRedirectsAdvancedSnippet Previewhttps://lifelessonsfromtheheart.com/?p=298Parenting 101 – The Gift of Wings | Life Lessons from the HeartWhile they were gone, I realized that God loved them even more than I did, and I had to trust their safety to Him. It was a life-changing event. No one can assure the safety of our children…Post TitleClick on the tags below to insert variables into your title. Post Title Separator Site TitleView all tags →

Post Title | Site Title 63 out of 60 max recommended characters.Meta DescriptionClick on the tags below to insert variables into your meta description. Post Excerpt Post Content SeparatorView all tags →

Post Content 1219 out of 160 max recommended characters.Focus KeyphraseAdd Focus KeyphraseGet Additional KeyphrasesAdditional KeyphrasesImprove your SEO rankings with additional keyphrases.Multiple Keyphrases is a Pro feature. Click here to get AIOSEO Pro →Page AnalysisBasic SEOTitleReadability

• Meta description length The meta description is over 160 characters.
• Content length The content is below the minimum of words. Add more content.
• Internal links We couldn’t find any internal links in your content. Add internal links in your content.
• External links No outbound links were found. Link out to external resources.

Open document settingsOpen publish panel

• Post

When my youngest son was in high school, he asked why he had to be in at a specific time. “Don’t you trust me?” I assured him that I trusted him, but I did not everyone else who would be out later than his curfew.

For years, a plaque hung in our home that read, “The most important gifts we give our children are roots and wings.”

I felt my children were a gift given to me by God to love and protect. So how do I give them wings and keep them safe? These are some of the ways I found:

One of the most important gifts we can give our children is the gift of roots. As a mother, grandmother, teacher, and now a CASA volunteer, I have seen the need for children to feel valued and belong. The longing for roots is why children in the foster care system who are not given a stable, loving home age out of the system and return to the exact condition they were removed from. They long for a family connection.

As a parent, one needs to provide an atmosphere of acceptance. Even when the child messes up, he needs to know that this is the first day of the rest of his life, and he has the opportunity to begin again. Parents have the unique opportunity to correct behavior while still showing the child he is loved and valued.

Roots mean a child has a place to come home to. A child in my son’s second-grade class many years ago suffered public humiliation at the hands of his parents. My son wept in my arms, saying, “Oh Mama, who do you have to love you when your mommy and daddy turn against you?” We must be a refuge for hurting hearts and a haven for joy.

Roots mean that a parent grounds a child spiritually. Children are only in our homes for a short time, and we need to give them a foundation that includes knowing that God loves them unconditionally. The world will often be unkind, but God loved us so much that He sacrificed His own Son that we might know that love personally. Our children need that as a basis for their lives.

Roots recognize the child’s limitations and celebrate the child’s accomplishments. Not every child will be a star athlete or outstanding student, and showing up and doing the best he can is a reason to celebrate a child’s accomplishments.

 When my daughter was in high school, I asked her coach if she played well, and he answered was, “She’s an excellent basketball player.”

My reply, “Coach, if you will tell her that, she will play her heart out for you. She is used to being told when she does something well.” He began some team-building activities that built all the team’s self-esteem, and those girls won district for the first time in years. Children respond to sincere praise, and they need the reinforcement that they are doing the best they can, win or lose.

While there are no foolproof ways to create roots, the following are starting places:

• Establish family time and traditions. Carve out two hours a week dedicated to doing something as a family. Include everyone. Make sure that holidays have meaning, and make them unique to your family dynamic.
• Choose a time to ban phones and talk to each other. Add that to the family time or mealtime.
• Worship together. Nothing gives a family roots better than a shared love of God.
• Be involved in your children’s lives – friends, activities, and dreams.

No one denies that these things take time, but nothing is sweeter than the door opening and a voice calling out, “Mom, Dad, I’m home.”

“Children are a gift from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.”

Psalm 173:3 NIV

How’s your tender loving care quotient? For what or for whom have you been appointed as a caregiver?

My daughter gave me a tiny poinsettia plant in a two-inch pot right before Thanksgiving, and it is still alive. It has a simple ribbon reaching through the soil to the bottom of the flower pot. As long as I put water enough to cover the bottom, the ribbon draws the water up, and the tiny plant continues to put on new growth. To tell the truth, in the last four months, it’s gotten pretty scraggly, but an hour after adding water, it perks up and puts on new leaves. I don’t pretend to have a green thumb, but as long as I care for that plant, it continues to thrive.

My pastor’s children show animals, and I have seen bathing, grooming, and training pictures. Not only has it provided an income, but it has taught them the importance of proper care.

Tender loving care applies to people in much the same way that plants grow or animals mature and thrive. Whatever season of life folks are in, they blossom with a loving touch, a gentle smile, or a kind word.

I am a CASA volunteer, and I see children go from defeated and withdrawn to glowing individuals when they discover someone cares about them. I have watched their faces light up with just a phone call or brief visit. More importantly, I have seen children race to the arms of adoptive parents who sit on the witness stand pledging to love these children for the rest of their lives.

We live in a retirement community, and the average age is 84. Although we are not near that age, I believe the secret to longevity is partially attributable to neighbors who care and a community that offers an active life. Hence, the residents live longer and like it. Too often, older people are left to their own devices because their children become too busy or disinterested to check on them regularly.

All of God’s creation is worthy of tender loving care, and we are the tenders of the beautiful world he has created – plant, animal, people – no matter the age. We have the privilege of being caregivers and following the admonition of the bible to love one another.

This week, I challenge you to look around for the opportunity to provide a bit of extra tender loving care. It does not take much to make a difference. It may be a drop of water, a warm smile, or an investment of your time. You have no idea what your kindness may mean. In fact, you may never know, but the idea is to see a need and fill it with love and tenderness.

“A new command I give to you. Love one another.

As I have loved you. You must love one another. John 13:23